Saturday, January 13, 2007

Who's Afraid of Women's Sexuality?

Throughout patriarchal history, women's sexuality and embodied spirituality has been feared, and therefore repressed. Now men can talk openly about penis-size insecurity (and women can joke about the over-big deal they make about it when it's just the girls,) but when will it be okay for guys to come out and say, "I'm afraid of women's sexuality. I'm intimidated by it. I'm afraid of the power it has over me"? Only then can men face their fears and discover that they are capable of honoring a woman's sexuality in a respectful way that brings life and joy, rather than betrayal and exploitation. This is the call of Christ, I believe.

Yet the closest an average Christian man or woman comes to acknowledging men's fear and the disservice it does to both women and men gone unaddressed, is to say, "Please don't wear provocative clothing; it causes your brothers to stumble." Or, "Please dress and act sexy for your husband, otherwise, some other woman might have sexual power over him and he may sleep her her instead." Well I'm here to say, I give men more credit, even if they don't give it to themselves...yet.

Just as women are capable and called not to repress their sexual selves, but to channel vital sensual energy in fabulous, healthy ways that honor our bodies, our souls, our God, our partners and our children who watch us and learn (well not literally;) I' convinced men are capable and called to honor the sacred sexuality, power and beauty of women in ways that respect the sexual, human dignity of men's true selves and women's true selves in Christ, while offering a joyous and faithful example for the children who watch and learn from their parents, who are living letters of Christ.

Lust is really the same as greed, stealing or coveting and in some cases addiction. Love acknowledges beauty without trying to steal it from someone else. Love respects the life force of Beauty without attempting to use it for one's own satisfaction. Love says, "wow, and amen," without needing to control, exploit or possess Beauty. Women's sexuality, proudly, and respectfully carried can elicit responses of worship, not for the woman, but for her Creator, whose womb birthed human beings, with all our blood and love, our feelings, sex and joy in being loved and honored simply for who we are. Yes, all of who we are.

We need a higher standard of control-free self-control -- that is, respect for our own and one another's bodies, spirits and relationships. We need to find our true freedom in Christ to honor one another's full selves out of love rather than controlling each other out of manipulation or insecurity. It's time for a sexual revolution of genuine respect.


rhetoricallyquestioned said...
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iRhetor said...

What a great blog! I hope y'all will keep going. As a single Christian woman, I was fortunate to have some seriously fantastic mentors early in my walk - women who didn't cower away from these real questions on sexuality and Christianity. I've struggled to try and set the same example among women that I encounter!

I can't wait to read past entries and such.

Anonymous said...

My friends and me talk openly about our sexual problems. A friend of mine suffers of erectile dysfunction but he's not afraid of talking about it, he even told me that he uses Generic Viagra.